Friday, July 11, 2008

enchanting garden - dying dad

Today, I am home alone, thinking about my Dad and my garden. My father has been very ill for a long time but this past couple weeks he became profoundly ill with little hope of recovering a normal life. We have been attending him in the Emergency Room,  Critical Care Unit, then he improved a bit and was moved to Progressive Care Unit. We saw in the CCU he was very weak and needed several strong medications to keep his seizures under control and we had to make a choice. The hardest choice I have had to make since, caring for my lover George back in 1992 while he was stricken with AIDS paralized and in a coma with no hope of any recovery. The choice to stop treatments is a really painful one but I was the guy, whom George gave his permission to decide. I got the doctors to tell me what they knew, then I talked to his family and eventually after a lot of heart break I had to let him go. That is a bit like what we have had to do in support of my Mother for my Dad. He is now in a lovely Arlington hospice with a enchanting garden wrapped all around. I came home from Manaassas yesterday when they moved him from hospital to the hospice in Arlington to tend my garden and rest up. We don't know how long he will stay with us now but he seems to be growing weaker each day. I am about to go back to the hospice and sit with him and visit with my family who are gathered around beside our Dad.
I see that my collection of garden photos is growing each day. I wanted to post some favorites before I go. My father and mother both love flower gardens and I am grateful to them for encouraging me to play in the dirt and grow flowers.  Flowers have given me hope so many times when everything seemed darkest they bring light and relief to the heavy heart.

No comments: